For Mother’s Day I decided to interview friends, Adrienne and Derric, who have the absolute privilege of raising five young men. I wanted to share a similar experience to when I was a child and was one of three girls. Well meaning people would pat my mother’s arm and say, “Don’t worry the boys will come later.” They did but not quite how people insinuated, but it left me wondering what was wrong with having three girls….. or any girls. Incidentally, my mother ended up with a boy when I was nineteen….. not my husband but my baby brother!!!!
Adrienne, Thank you so much for sharing a small portion of your world with us! So, what are your children’s names and ages? Weston-8, Gavin-7, Grant- 5, Jayden-3, Reid-1
When did you decide you wanted multiple children? When Derric and I were dating/engaged we talked about desiring more than 3 children. In my heart I always thought 4-ish range, he said 3-ish, so we compromised at 5. wink emoticon I will note our 5th pregnancy was not planned, but it was NOT a mistake.
What comments do you get when people notice you have all boys and how are they hurtful? When I had the first 2 boys so close in age, I would get asked if they were twins and then at times people would ask if we will try for a girl. When the 3rd and 4th (pregnancies) came along, I started getting the comments “You have your hands full, You ARE busy”, and the one that bothered me the most “You must be hoping for a girl” It bothered me because they would see 2 or 3 boys, and no girls and therefore I clearly was missing out on what they thought was a picture perfect family. I didn’t like that people would project their own thoughts onto me or my family. But over time, I began to see it as a challenge to give God the glory when I felt like the comments were more from a negative perspective. Now don’t get me wrong, not everyone that commented was offensive or bothersome, some people really were just intrigued with the fact that we have 3,4, now 5 boys!
I noticed with my 4th and 5th pregnancies, (more with the 5th) that the negative comments subsided. People reacted more in amazement and wonder, ha ha. “5 BOYS!?” Me jumping right in.. “Oh yes, BOY I am blessed!”
What do you want people to know about raising all boys? Derric and I feel very humbled at times that God saw us fit to raise 5 men, 5 MEN! Overtime it has become clearer and clearer to us that raising our sons in the Kingdom of God is our calling. That thought can be overwhelming at times…
How has raising all boys changed your perspective on life? Raising sons (for me) does not have the negative picture that some people paint it as. Are my boys, boys? Yes. Do they think burping, butts, and farts are funny? Yes. But honestly who doesn’t?! wink emoticon Do they get dirty, muddy, and play hard? You bet! Is this really that bad? NO! I feel very privileged to be a mother of boys. They are sweet and sensitive. I think because we are lacking the female-influence (from sisters) in our home, they may be a little more well-rounded in some areas because who else do I get to bake with, craft with, do “women-chores” etc. with? Our boys really do love me and treat me like a princess. They look our for their momma and in a strange way, I feel protected by them. Life with our boys is an adventure!
Speaking of adventure, I have been feeling more and more that God giving us 5 sons will make for an exciting life! I do not see me being the “only girl” as a hardship or negative or that I’m left out. (like I thought I would have 8 years ago) These 6 (hubs included)amazing guys want mom in on their adventures! Fishing, Skiing, hiking, hunting,sports, whatever, I really do not want to be at home when they are out on their adventures, I WANT TO BE THERE! And they want me there. So my perspective on life has changed for Derric and I. We see so much GOOD in raising our boys.
These small glimpses of hope I see as God’s handiwork and faithfulness. Don’t get me wrong there have been many times I have asked God “why”. Why He designed our family this way.. But in my questions and pleading He has remained faithful. Our boys are a gift and a promise that God IS good, He CAN be trusted, He IS sovereign.
Any funny stories? I think funny stories would be simply when we all our out together. Derric and I forget what we must look like to others (because we are used to “us”) until we see people staring. You can tell they are counting all the little boys one by one and their eyes get bigger and bigger. They end up seeing us and realize we know what their doing, then we get smirks and smiles. It cracks Derric and I up!
What do you do to create some girl time? I create girl-time all the time! I hang out with my 6 nieces when I can. My dear mom-friends let me hang out with their daughters, and they too love on my boys. I get out with ladies/friends often to get a break.
What final word do you have on raising multiple boys? True Blessing!
Thank you so much for sharing! I love hearing your story
and I love watching you with your children!
What about you?! What is your special mom memory?